The offered visit on Saturday by N didn't happen. Consistent with the pattern I've stated of about 50% of such visits not happening. I've learned to just let these disappointments--which happen 50% of the time--just pass. Complaints don't go well--she only suggests no more dates. Last week I disappointed her by not calling or taking her to the store at midnight on Saturday--and she seemed to be breaking off our 4 1/2 year relationship because of it. I admit, that might have been worse than her typical missed date, though she said later she wasn't inconvenienced, and I sent her an offer to go to the next morning when I myself finally went. And I had two pretty good excuses: lost phone and panic over getting ready for party (the latter should have been obvious when she was here suggesting I pick her up). Anyway, a week later normalcy seems to have been re-established.
I was texting all day, got a thank you at 5pm, but got nothing later until I texted at 12:45am asking if she had fallen asleep and got reply at 1:15 "Home, not well."
Went better on Sunday, N was replying to texts once and awhile, and I did finally get a text at 12:21am asking if I was taking calls. (Why didn't she just call as I've asked many times?) I tried calling back but got busy signal. So I texted at 12:23 "Sure" and got a call right away. I described how I plan to move into Queen's Room in September, but to only remodel King's room, possibly leaving bath remodeling until later, depending on how things go. Then I could have Queen's Room available after that. I decidedly did not ask or say anything about her moving in...which could be interpreted as "pressure." She has said she doesn't want to be pressured." On the other hand, she seems to want to know about my remodeling progress...and I'm thinking that's now what I should give when she starts talking about major home remodeling projects at her house--as she was on Friday night. She was having problem with someone at door (and I wonder if not just wind, I noticed similar thing later) and was talking about extending out entry way and adding second door. I told her I thought that would be very expensive, but didn't say more than that. I talked about the doorbell camera I plan to get offered to show her when I get it--and she was interested in that. But I was also thinking--why is she thinking about a project that might cost $10,000 when, at least not long ago and for the previous 4 years, her plan was to move over here this year or next or thereabouts? But I've decided not to ask such things directly, but instead take them as cue to talk about remodeling progress. Of course she hasn't got the needed $10,000, or even $2000, so I don't expect to see her investing that or any significant change on her current home, and she gets to keep it when she moves over here anyway, so anything she does spend isn't lost.
For her part, on Sunday she offered to come over Tuesday or Wednesday, right after work, which would be about 7am. I usually sleep mornings and mid-afternoon until 3pm, getting up unpredictably for breakfast and other things, and she knows that, and asked if it was OK. I said sure, I could go back to sleep later.
It was great to get a phone call, and we did have calls on Friday night and Sunday this weekend, making for a better week ending than last week. She texted on Monday morning and quickly replied to my reply. Yes, things are getting better again. Now what will happen on Tuesday morning?
I was texting all day, got a thank you at 5pm, but got nothing later until I texted at 12:45am asking if she had fallen asleep and got reply at 1:15 "Home, not well."
Went better on Sunday, N was replying to texts once and awhile, and I did finally get a text at 12:21am asking if I was taking calls. (Why didn't she just call as I've asked many times?) I tried calling back but got busy signal. So I texted at 12:23 "Sure" and got a call right away. I described how I plan to move into Queen's Room in September, but to only remodel King's room, possibly leaving bath remodeling until later, depending on how things go. Then I could have Queen's Room available after that. I decidedly did not ask or say anything about her moving in...which could be interpreted as "pressure." She has said she doesn't want to be pressured." On the other hand, she seems to want to know about my remodeling progress...and I'm thinking that's now what I should give when she starts talking about major home remodeling projects at her house--as she was on Friday night. She was having problem with someone at door (and I wonder if not just wind, I noticed similar thing later) and was talking about extending out entry way and adding second door. I told her I thought that would be very expensive, but didn't say more than that. I talked about the doorbell camera I plan to get offered to show her when I get it--and she was interested in that. But I was also thinking--why is she thinking about a project that might cost $10,000 when, at least not long ago and for the previous 4 years, her plan was to move over here this year or next or thereabouts? But I've decided not to ask such things directly, but instead take them as cue to talk about remodeling progress. Of course she hasn't got the needed $10,000, or even $2000, so I don't expect to see her investing that or any significant change on her current home, and she gets to keep it when she moves over here anyway, so anything she does spend isn't lost.
For her part, on Sunday she offered to come over Tuesday or Wednesday, right after work, which would be about 7am. I usually sleep mornings and mid-afternoon until 3pm, getting up unpredictably for breakfast and other things, and she knows that, and asked if it was OK. I said sure, I could go back to sleep later.
It was great to get a phone call, and we did have calls on Friday night and Sunday this weekend, making for a better week ending than last week. She texted on Monday morning and quickly replied to my reply. Yes, things are getting better again. Now what will happen on Tuesday morning?
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